Spectrum
by voodoobuddha
Summary: Zuko is lost in the storm. Unconfident of his abilities to be Fire Lord he arranges a replacement.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer - Avatar: The Last Airbender and all related characters and settings belong to people who aren't me and I'm not making any money from this.

* * *

"We've been here for three months."

"I know."

"Three _months_, Aang."

"He knows, Sokka." Katara sighs as she lazily bends balls of water into the air for Momo to catch and drink.

"Three months!" Sokka shouts, throwing his arms dramatically in the air.

"After everything you guys have been through I thought you'd enjoy a long rest."

Some of Sokka's frustration drains away when he turns to find Suki, her arms buried elbow deep in Appa's fur, scratching the bison's back.

"It's not that. It's just . . . I feel like we should be doing something besides loafing around the Fire Nation's Royal City."

"Like what?" Aang asks, finally breaking from his meditative pose.

"I don't know. Helping rebuild the Southern Tribe?"

"Maybe you're just homesick," Toph chimes in, "But you're right," she continues before Sokka can protest, "There are other places where we could help more."

"I disagree," comes a voice from the doorway of the stable specially reserved for Appa.

Zuko looks stressed and haggard as he steps into the shade. Even Toph can tell how tired he is by the drag of his footsteps.

"The Fire Nation has been subjected to a hundred years of xenophobic propaganda," he says, "I could use all the help I can get to reverse it."

"Okay, you've got a good point." Sokka concedes.

"If you really want to leave I won't keep you, but - I'm waiting for something. I'd like it if you waited with me." the pleading note in his voice is unmistakable.

"We'd be happy to," Aang agrees with real feeling.

"Of course we would," Katara adds.

"I haven't got anything better to do," Toph shrugs.

"What are you waiting for? OW!" Sokka turns to look at the crag of rock that'd hit him rather hard in the shin.

"It would probably be a good idea to give Aang some weapons training. No one would expect him to attack with something other than bending," Suki ruminates by way of agreement.

"Thank you," Zuko says before turning his attention solely to Aang.

"I have some free time this afternoon. Perhaps you'd like to train with me?"

"Of course," Aang says and the two young men bow to each other before the Fire Lord departs.

* * *

Less than three weeks later there is a knock on the doors of the Fire Lord's audience chamber. The messenger barges in without further notice, as per instructions, interrupting the Fire Lord in the middle of a meeting with the nations Minister of Education.

"Fire Lord," the young boy gasps, "He's arrived."

The Fire Lord responds by immediately dismissing the minister with promises of a rescheduled meeting before turning his attention to the boy standing just inside the doors waiting for orders.

"You're sure?"

"Positive, my lord."

"Ready the palanquin," Zuko orders, "And bring him straight to my private quarters."

"Yes, my lord." the boy responds, backing out of the room respectfully before relaying orders to the Fire Lord's servants.

For half an hour Zuko paced his private sitting room nervously. He'd spent months thinking, agonizing, over what he'd say when the man he'd been waiting for was finally brought before him and now, with the prospect dwelling immediately on the horizon, he's forgotten it all. He fiddles with the ornate china tea set laid out on his sitting room table instead of over thinking and second-guessing his possible reactions.

The second the old man has entered the room the Fire Lord is prostrate before him.

"I'm sorry." Zuko says to the floor, unable to look at the man in front of him. He is immediately wrapped in a fierce and, regretfully, unfamiliar hug.

Long minutes pass before Zuko is able to speak through his tears.

"I'm sorry," he reiterates.

Hours they spend inside the Fire Lord's chambers talking when Zuko finally brings up the subject he has been dreading.

"I can't do this, Uncle. Not yet."

"What can't you do?"

"This," Zuko throws his arms wide to indicate the entire room, "I can't be Fire Lord."

"You can do anything you put your mind to." Iroh tells him, serious and supporting.

"Not this time," Zuko sighs, "I've thousands of prisoners of war to release, an entire education system to reform, an army in the millions to scale back, dozens of war based industries that are no longer needed, generations of belief to be abolished, and there have already been three assassination attempts on me.

"I'm lost in the storm."

"You underestimate yourself, Zuko. You've always found your way back out again."

"And how much damage have I caused in the process? How many people have been hurt?" Zuko demands.

After so many years of determination, Iroh is unable to respond to his suddenly doubtful nephews questions.

"The world can't wait while I try to find my way. Change has to come _now_."

"What would you have me do, Zuko? Advise you?"

"I have five highly trusted advisors. I don't need any more," Zuko says, thinking of the Avatar, of his friends, "What I need is for someone to be Fire Lord until I'm older. Wiser."

"I'm old," Iroh sighs, "Too old to begin ruling a country."

"Then act as my regent," Zuko pleads, "Just until I'm ready."

Several more hours pass as they argue and plead with each other. By the time morning dawns in the Fire Nation there is a regent ruler.

"What are you going to do now?" Aang asks when the news is revealed.

"I was thinking that the Avatar could use some more training in Fire Bending." Zuko replies, smiling almost nervously.

"Wait. We were waiting for your _uncle_?" Sokka asks.

_* * *_

_**Author's Note:** I'm going to tell you up front that I'm pretty lazy and the time between chapters will probably be great. This story has been rattling around in my head since_ 'The Western Air Temple'_ which should tell you something about how long it takes my thoughts to transfer to paper. It doesn't help that my muse depends primarily on alcohol and nicotine so she's an expensive b*tch to feed._

_Really hope you like it._

_-Voodoo_


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer - Avatar: The Last Air bender and all related characters and settings belong to people who aren't me and I'm not making any money from this.

* * *

At the Southern Air Temple Zuko finally realized just what his great-grandfather had done to the world.

He stands towards the back of the room, far enough away that he wouldn't have to look on Aang's face as he kneels before his dead master's skeleton among corpses of the Fire Nation soldiers that had killed his people. He looks too much like the boy he really is wrapped up in Katara's embrace, far too vulnerable for Zuko to stomach.

Not for the first time Zuko is ashamed of the blood running through his veins and furious with his ancestors.

After a moment of heavy silence, Aang approaches the man who had raised him. Zuko has to look away.

He swings his gaze to the side of the room where Sokka and Suki hold each other, grief for their friend's loss etched onto their faces and unshed tears shining in their eyes.

There's no safe place for Zuko to look; evidence of what his people had done is everywhere. He turns, feeling like an unwelcome intruder in someone else's despair. He sees Toph standing, slightly behind him and to the side, tense up. His immediate thought is of a fight heading his way.

"Almost as much in bones as in metal," she whispers through gritted teeth, soft enough that only he'd be able to hear.

Zuko turns towards where Aang is gently pulling dead monk's necklace off over his skull.

It only takes Zuko a second to realize what Toph is doing; she's holding the man's bones together so they don't crumble in a heap of dust while her friend is there to witness it. Zuko stops trying to escape, unwilling to be the one to break Toph's concentration. Instead, he watches as Aang replaces the necklace that he's taking with the newer one he has already stripped from around his own neck, feeling sick with guilt the whole time.

That night they set up camp in the Hall of Avatars.

Nobody speaks as they prepare and eat dinner. The mood is too somber for their usually happy conversations.

As soon as the meal is done, Aang rises and walks toward the center of the room. His friends don't even think; they just follow.

When he comes to what might be the end or the beginning of the spiraling line of statues, he stops.

"Roku," he says, touching the stone almost reverently, "Kyoshi, Kuruk, Yangchen, Tzun, Hiro, Yuroki,..."

Aang continues down the line, speaking each name as if it were a blessing, but Zuko is rooted to the spot. He looks on the likeness of his own great-grandfather for the first time.

Zuko is unsure how much time passed when he feels Toph move beside him. The light from the flame in Aang's hand has faded away, shining only dimly from where he walks spiraling paths up the walls.

There's a series of quick moves from Toph and yet another statue springs from the rock to stand beside Roku. It's features are vague and undefined. It's Aang, but it's how Toph _'sees'_ Aang.

"Aang's going to be a while. He's got a good three miles of statues to go through yet," she says and Zuko looks up to where the ceiling is lost in darkness, "Might as well get some sleep."

"Yeah," he agrees and they both make their way back to where the rest of the group is.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer - Avatar: The Last Airbender and all related characters and settings belong to people who aren't me and I'm not making any money from this.

***

After only a hour Toph could honestly say that she hated the South Pole; actually it'd taken twenty minutes (the time it took for bare feet to come in contact with deep snow and then for Katara to coax her into boots and off Appa). An hour only cemented her dislike and made her increasingly miserable.

Hakoda had arranged for a tour of the Southern Water Tribe and the rebuilding on their arrival. Toph immediately declined. She couldn't see on the ice, let alone through the too large boots, and if she was going to feel this vulnerable she'd prefer to do it while warm.

Unfortunately the guest hut that Hakoda led them too was made entirely out of ice as well.

After making sure for the seventh time (she'd counted) that she didn't want to go, Toph was left there.

Unable to use Earthbending to find her way around, Toph used her hands to explore the room and to pile every blanket, fur, or piece of fabric she could find onto one of the beds as a sort of cocoon for her to climb into and try not to cry as every silly, childish, unrealistic fantasy she'd ever had of staying here and making Sokka love her crumbled. She'd never be happy if she stayed and she couldn't ask him to leave his responsibilities behind, even if Katara wasn't staying.

It didn't take long for sleep to take her.

***

The summer is when it is darkest at the South Pole, so Zuko isn't quite sure how long it's been when he finally makes it back to the guest suite where he, Toph, Suki, and Aang will be staying. He'd been kept a long time talking politics with the benders who'd moved from North to South and the tribe's elders as he was still, technically, the Firelord, but he'd finally managed to find a reason to leave; escorting Toph to the feast namely.

He wasn't really surprised to find a lumpy mound of fur and fabric piled on one of the beds when he returned to the guest suite they'd been granted. He'd silently contemplated stealing Sokka's coat as he was closest to Zuko's size, but he'd drawn on his experience of chasing Aang across the globe, through a North Pole snow storm, and hadn't acted on it. Instead he discreetly used Firebending to warm himself. Openly Firebending wouldn't earn him any points with these people so he thought.

Zuko had to dig deep to finally find the tiny body buried underneath all the makeshift blankets, but he did it and gently shook.

She popped out of the covers like a turtle duck, a thing he'd never mention aloud to her, and says, quite eloquently "Huba wha?"

"The feast is about to start." and she groaned in response as she curled back up beneath the covers.

He continued to shake her until she woke and put on her barrowed boots before suggesting she wash her face (which earned him an _un_affectionate punch in his arm); he couldn't help but notice the tear tracks on her cheeks or how her eyes were pink and puffy (another thing he'd never mention to her). Then he escorted her to the feast.

***

Author's Note: Told you chapters wouldn't be coming quickly. Anyways, yeah. Hope you like.


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